The Song That I Sing

These are the lyrics to a song I wrote a few years ago. This song seems to echo in my heart often as I think about the meaning; what it meant to me when I wrote it and how the true it is still in my life today. I wrote from a place of feeling desperation and helplessness. Feeling that I can’t be what I am supposed to be. That I am not good enough and can’t seem to get things in order enough for people to see me for who I believed God was calling me to be. But even then I knew I couldn’t stop pursing what my hearts longed for and for what I believed passionately God had called me to.

Well, I thought I would post this and ask for thoughts. I am curious if you find meaning in this song. If it is just something that holds meaning to me and is a mess of jumbled words to the rest of us then I am cool with that. It is definitely not my most grammar friendly song.

So I am just throwing this out there and seeing what people think. Do you find meaning in the words? If so what is the meaning that speaks to you? Thanks for taking a few minutes to read, and even respond if you have a chance or thoughts on the song.

God bless!

The Song That I Sing

Here I stand again and again
Singing out that same old tune
To many words for me to recount
Yet we all can sing it to
So close you eyes and sing for the time is coming near
When what we sing will be called to be true
Can we stand on the song we've all sung
Or will the truth break us in two

I can’t seem to stop
For the words have become my life song
I know I know all there is to know
About the songs that I’ve sung
But if life must be the same as I’m singing then I’m afraid
That I won’t be all that I sing

I have sung to many things
To try to keep them all in tune
And here I am with more songs to sing
But the guilt creeps over me
But if I stop singing I know that my life
Would not be the right song
But what if my song does not sing
The way I know it should go

So I can’t bare to sing
Theses truths I’ve sung anymore
All the things I sang
I have now been called to hold
Is it even possible for me to carry this tune
But this song is what I know I should do

Who's Making It Happen?

It’s been a long time since I posted anything. Not for any good or bad reason. Just nothing I have thought I wanted to say but now might be a good time for some thoughts I have been having in my life. I was reading the book of Ruth a while back without seeking anything particular. As I read it I was impressed with seeing how God “sneaks” his plans into our lives, especially when we think we are just trying to survive with the decisions that we make. I thought of Ruth and Naomi. Both had suffered much heartache with the loss of their husbands and, for Naomi, her sons as well. Then a tough decision by Naomi to move back home and Ruth’s tougher decision to “give up” family and security to go take care of Naomi and move with her. Then reading you see this apparently random process of Ruth going to Boaz’s field. Boaz happening to notice her and then they fall in love and get married. The thing is, from what we read or the author tells us, there was little if any strategy to the decisions that were made. But yet in the marriage of Ruth and Boaz, Ruth becomes a part of the lineage of King David and the Messiah. How more “perfect” could this have worked out? How “luckier” could they have been? To me it speaks to God’s great mercy and sovereignty. How God does so many things and works so many details out and we don’t see it as him and forget to even give him the credit (I am not saying Ruth or Naomi did that). However I must ask myself who do I REALY put my trust in. Is it in my decisions or do I believe God is actively, not just taking advantage of situations, but actually causing them to bring about things that are outside of even my dreams? Boaz was outside of Ruth’s dreams but God, I believe, was active in thoughts, decisions, and actions that led them to the end of the story. I guess just something to think about. God is not just “Working things out” he is making things happen. The question for me is when he “makes something happen” I don’t like do I have enough faith in him and his will for me and life in general to trust his actions over my perspective?

The Expression of Worship

In the previous post I briefly described worship and sought to show a basic, starting point definition of worship. The discussion led itself toward the issue of music as a primary expression of worship in our churches. Al though I want to eventually discuss that more then I did in the previous posts discussion, right now I want to look at something else first.

Worship, as seen in the previous posts, is an encounter with God that is special and intimate were we bring ourselves before God and worship him for who he is because he is God.
Worship is a combination of heart and action. It is a heart of knowing who I am before God and who he is and his desire for me to worship him because he is the ONLY GOD. The actions are the expressions of worship and scripture give us many different expressions of worship.

We see these found predominantly in the words “Praise”. One thing to note is that when we see the word “Praise” used in scripture it actually has a deeper meaning each time and is translated into some form of action and command. As I have studied it more I believe praise is not a form of worship but is the expression of worship that we as humans express toward God. Here are the first two times we see praised used:
Gen 24:26-27
26 The man bowed low and worshiped the Lord. 27 "Praise the Lord, the God of my master, Abraham," he said. "The Lord has shown unfailing love and faithfulness to my master, for he has led me straight to my master's relatives."

The word worship is the same as seen the first post. This is the intimate, encounter with God as seen also in John 4:23 (The worship The Father seeks). So scripture says he worshiped and then we see the word Praise used – This word reveals how he expressed his worship. This word praise means to bow and take a knee before God.
The other verse were we first see Praise is:
Gen 29:35
35 And she conceived again, and bare a son. And she said, This time will I praise Jehovah. Therefore she called his name Judah. And she left off bearing.

This word has completely different meaning. It is a “reverent act of worship” done with hands thrown in the air or extended in the air, also to shake the hands in the air. Sound familiar at all? Well for me I have seen people worshiping God in this manner since I was a kid. How exciting to see this is one of the earliest expressions of worship we see in the Bible.

I could go on and on exploring every time the word Praise is used in the bible, however, for the sake of time I am going to look at the book of the Bible were we see the word “Praise’ as an act of worship used the most, Psalms.
Here are the different ways praised is used in order as we see in the Book of Psalms:
1 To remember or express memory in a way of honor
2 To make music or play in a group of musicians
3 Throw hands up in reverent worship; shake hands in air
4 A structured song
5 To bless, Salute for honor or kneel to show honor

These are the first 5 found in the first 10 chapters of Psalm. You will also notice as you read Psalms that music is associated closely in the expression of these acts of worship. Music is a powerful tool in which to tunnel these expressions of worship. I believe it is important to show expression and to have a variety of expressions in our worship of God. But wow… there is so much more in just this study of our expression of worship to God. My desire was to challenge me and now maybe challenge you in your view of worship and even how you express your worship toward God. I heard a man say one time that we have to look at the Bible since the Bible is were God reveals his heart. How would you like to have spent your entire life making Carrot Cake for God only to find out he preferred Chocolate. The challenge is to explore what God reveals in his word how he desires to see us worship Him.

For Him or Me?

I had the privilege to speak at a Worship Retreat for a church in Nebraska this past weekend. I spoke on several different things and even explored several different aspects of worship but there was one that keeps standing out to me and challenges me regularly.
First even asking the question, “What is Worship” is challenging one that will have many different meanings depending on who you ask. Sadly our answers our commonly based on our own favorite personal experiences instead on what we might found biblically.
So I was challenged to ask my self what was the definition of worship.

The dictionary says this:
“giving great honor or reference to, great love and admiration, and extremely precious is the receiver (Webster)
Reverent devotion and allegiance pledged to God; or an other deity, the rituals or ceremonies by which this reverence is expressed. The English word worship comes from the Old English word worthship, a word which denotes the worthiness of the one receiving the special honor or devotion.

There are several different biblical definitions when you look up the word worship in the Bible but the first two uses of the word used in the Old Testament have two different Hebrew meanings.
The first means to have a face to face, personal, encounter with God. The second means to bow and show homage to God.
Then the first use we find in the New Testament in the Gospel of John is when Jesus is describing in John 4:23 what the Father seeks.
This worship that the father seeks is an intimate encounter with God, to kiss the hand and bow low.

What I find interesting about both the dictionary and biblical seems to have a theme in common. The theme is that it is ALL about who God is and nothing about me. I am to encounter God and worship him because he is God and bow before him not to get something but to Give something.

Worship, however you might do it, is all about God. I heard a quote recently that sums it up.
To pretend homage to God and intend only the advantage to myself is rather to mock God than worship Him. When we believe we ought to be satisfied rather than God glorified, we set God below ourselves and imagine that He should submit His own honor to our advantage.
Steven Charnock Discourse IV “Practical Atheism”

Our worship of God is for God and not us. Now when we encounter God it is impossible to not get something out of this experience but to come for the experience or to let the nature of experience determine to joy or passion of our worship is to completely miss worship and it robs God of the worship he deserves.

Just something for all of us to think about. Obviously different people and people groups express worship differently but ultimately less always focus on worship itself. Let’s worship God for who he is no matter whether we may like or not like about the current conditions of the worship experience.

God bless!

Car Accident

As some of you know on January 22nd I was in a rough car accident with Joe Roraff. He was driving and I was in the passenger seat. We were hit strait on the passenger side by a Mac truck. Yes I said a Mac Truck. That is no exaggeration, as you will be able to see from the pictures.
When we were hit Joe and I both were knocked out. Joe said he woke up and when he first saw me he thought I was dead, but the he noticed I was breathing. We were taking by ambulance to Gunderson and they tool great care of us. Joe had a deflated lung and had to stay 3 nights in the hospital to have his lung re-inflated. Praise God Joe has pretty much recovered and is doing great.

I have been spending most of my time on my couch on my back. I have a lot of sore muscles and a cracked bone on my vertebra. However nothing is permanent and I am expecting to have a full recovery in over the next few months. All I can say is "Praise God!” It could have been much worse.
Well Joe and I are doing well. I hope to be back at work in a week or so and thank God Joe should be back next week. We both can't be gone for a long time. (For those who don't know Joe and I work together)

Anyways take a look at the pictures but don't worry. It looks worse then we feel. God was there and took care of us and held us close. Praise God from whom all Blessing Flow!

PS: You can see more pictures by clicking on the "My Pictures" link on the left side of the blog home page in the "Check Them Out" section.

Confronting Sin - Part 2

(Make sure you read part 1 first)

Now in confronting I am not talking about yelling and condemning. The nature of Jesus was not to condemn yet it was not to ignore sin but to while loving the sinner, confront the sin. Let’s look at a story of how Jesus handled a sinner.

John 8:7-11

"If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her." 8 Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.

9 At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. 10 Jesus straightened up and asked her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?"

11 "No one, sir," she said.

"Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."

NIV

Jesus sets up two strong examples of how to be Jesus to someone caught in sin. First Jesus did not condemn. He did not attack. The word condemn here is a root of the word punish. Jesus was not out to punish this women, and we are not to try to be the judge that punishes those that sin against us. But he still said to her “leave your life of sin”. Another version says “Go and sin no more”. Jesus does not ignore the sin. He still confronts, lovingly, but calls the life she had been living sin and said leave that life. I believe this is consistent with Mathew 18. The purpose is to win our fellow believer over from sin to righteousness. If we do not challenge each other and confront each other of sin then we are in danger of playing a part of people falling deeper into their life of sin. A sin that at one point might have only hurt a few but when escalating will hurt many more.

This is what I am seeing in our relationships today. We allow sin to occur against us and to others and refuse to address it hiding behind some false spiritual idea that Jesus did things like that. That is a lie and must end now, in all of us. It is a lie based on fear of confronting. A lie based on fear of rejection. A lie based on a fear of others response to us confronting. Fear can never be what defines and determines our actions. One of my most favorite verses in the Bible that has constantly challenged me is in 2 Timothy 1:7:

2 Tim 1:7

7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.

Follow that with this next verse on love.

1 John 4:16-18

God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. 17 In this way, love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like him. 18 There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

NIV

When we tell our selves that to love someone is to let their sin go and ignore their sin we ignore what real love is. Love was manifested perfectly in Jesus and in Jesus’ love He confronted sin. If you want to truly love someone, die to your fears and love by being Jesus to them in all aspects of Jesus ministry. The loving father, who does not condemn but yet, does not ignore sin. I believe we end up sinning against our brother and sisters, our friends, when we “ignore sin” or just “let it go”

I want to challenge each of you, including me to break away from this lie that I have seen driving our Christian relationships. This lie is hurting us and we don’t even see it. Please seek God on this. Challenge your thoughts and actions against is word. Not just against your personal thoughts on conflict and sin. If you truly want to be Jesus then take action to change the patterns of sin and complacency that is coming so quickly upon us.

I will end with one more verse. One many of us don’t like to hear but if you still think that you can’t confront sin because you are not to judge others. Read the verse below.

1 Cor 5:12-13

12 What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? 13 God will judge those outside. "Expel the wicked man from among you.

NIV

We are not called to judge those outside of the family of God but we are called to judge each other, for two main reasons. The first being all that I have written before but the second being that eventually we have to take strong action against sin and remove it from our body if those sinning refuse to acknowledge their sin and work to change. This is even tougher but my point is to do whatever you can to not let it get to this point. Fight for each other and our relationships in the little things so we can stand strong to not get to the place when we have to deal with the big things. It is all worth it to honor Christ’s with our actions and help keep each other strong in our actions and faith.

God bless all of you!

Your Fellow Servant In Christ,

David Baxley

Confronting Sin - Part 1

Dear friends, brother and sisters in Christ,

I am writing this because I have been noticing a pattern that greatly concerns me. It is a pattern that I see hurting friendships and the ministries I see people being a part of. I have been working in ministry and with ministry people in close relationship for over ten years. I have always seen conflicts come and go but what I am starting to observe more recently really disturbs me. I am seeing people hurt on not talking about. I see people getting angry and not admitting to it. I see friends becoming bitter and not dealing with it. I am seeing people hide there emotions and feelings around some warped false idea that to be Jesus with each other means to ignore the things that people do wrong and act as if all is fine. That is not being Jesus, that is living a lie and ignoring a huge part of Jesus and his teaching on dealing with relationships and conflicts in the body of Christ.

At first I just thought that the situations were rare and unique but as I have become closer with many of those I serve with or live in fellowship with I am realizing that this blinding and ignoring of wrongs done to us and to others in the name of being Jesus is not only a false teaching but a lie form the enemy that he is and will continue to use against the body of Christ until we choose to stop it.

Lest start right from scripture:

Matt 18:15-17

15 "If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. 16 But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.

NIV

These words come right out of the mouth of Jesus. So it is very safe to assume that to be Jesus to each other means to follow His teaching, hence, follow this verse. The first line is where it all starts, “if your brother sins against you GO”. This to me appears as a command. Jesus says GO. He doesn’t say if you feel like it go, or if it is worth dealing with go, or if you are hurt or angry enough go. No, it says if someone sins against you go. For what purpose do you go? You go to win your brother over. You go to restore a relationship, not just between you and the person but between that person and God who they have also sinned against. You go to keep the sin from happening again.

Lets say some one I know that I am friends with is having a rough time financially. In this I realize that they stole $20 from my wallet. If they were in need that badly I would have given it to them so what is the point of addressing it, I will be Jesus to them by just letting them have it. That is what I hear so many saying. But the problem is that next week they steel $20 from someone else. Then the next week they steal from someone else. Then they end up stealing a purse or a wallet or even worse. The entire build up of sin that could lead a person to jail could have all been avoided by the first person confronting the sin that occurred. The enemy wins because I hid behind a lie that to be Jesus to them I “let sin go”. My experience with sin, and from what I see in God’s word, is that it does not just stop on its own. It usually takes a bad fall in their sin for people to start to turn. Would it not be better if we would love each other enough to confront sin in the little or big things so that the sin does not begin to consume our brother or sister and cause them or others around them to take that terrible fall?

The Reason For the Elements

I wrote recently in a post called “The Power of the Elements” about why I believe that using various elements in our worship and teaching is consistent with how God speaks and reveals himself in nature. I also talked about how these elements can be a powerful tool to opening many of our senses that would otherwise be un-stimulated and play an important role in revealing aspects of God that might otherwise be missed.

Recently I was preparing some of those elements for a worship service that our church was having. This service was extremely special because we had rented a large facility and the entire church body, which is normally spread out over three different services, was coming together for one service. Bringing over one thousand people together in a rented location can require a few more things to make it come together. As I was preparing for this I realized that there were some things I could do to really bring out the use of the elements we use in our services. I got excited about these possibilities and everything seemed to be coming together for the rehearsal the night before. Then that night it all broke loose. None of the video equipment was coming together and things were just not working for no reason that we could find. Then after all of that when we were about to leave one of the computers that was running the graphics for the event crashed. I was so tired and stressed I just laid on the ground trying to think it through. Then I pulled my other producer aside and we prayed and God spoke. He told me to chill! The things we were doing were great but I had lost the focus and reason for why I was doing them. I was doing them to help draw people to him. I had forgotten. I believe God broke one of the computers to bring things in perspective. To bring me back to my purpose, and it worked. I went home completely unstressed. I was just excited about what God would be doing the next day and excited about our entire body coming together to worship and seek him. Things went awesome and God moved!

It is easy to get caught up in doing things for God that we forget we are doing them for him. We get caught up in the task of our Christian walk and forget about just being in a relationship with a God that loves us so much. I hope I hold on to this little reminder for a long time. Praise God for how he speaks, so gently and so loving, if we are willing to listen.

Iron Sharpening Iron – Part 2 - Some Answers

Proverbs 27:17

As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.

I love the comments left in part one of this post. Thank you!

The two themes that I found were:

1 You need to determine if it is your responsibility

2 Loving your neighbor as yourself.

Although I do struggle with the concept of when it is my responsibility or not, the “love your neighbor as yourself” statement really hit home. The phrase “Christian Police” came up a few times. I realized that many times I find myself thinking like that, like somehow it is my responsibility to right the wrongs, in myself and others. But along with that I found myself doing that, not anytime I saw something wrong, but anytime I see something wrong that is in turn hurting or robbing others of what God would have for them. I am learning more and more about God’s desire for us to act justly as believers and fight injustice, well I hate the injustice that I see so many times that occurs to others because of someone else’s sin. I feel, right or wrong (I am not sure yet), that when such an injustice occurs I am sinning if I see it and do nothing. However as I journey through this I do know one thing, it is in loving whoever I find myself being called to sharpen in the same love that God shows me and I want shown to me that real justice can occur, that a real wrong can truly be righted. Trying to right a wrong in a wrong way does not create justice or peace. If I am honest with myself about how I communicate and what my true motives are then I believe I can stand before God and know I honored Him with this part of my life. Knowing what to do and when to do it is still very hard but knowing how to is much more clear and it is in knowing the “how” that I feel more empowered to act when I feel the tug in my spirit. Rather it is because of my love for someone or because of an injustice occurring, I still will act as I must, “do unto others as I would have them act towards me”. In a love that represents the grace and mercy of God on us all.

Iron Sharpening Iron – Part 1 - The Questions

Proverbs 27:17

As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.

This is a very popular verse used especially in many church communities for people in accountability groups to help each other grow and deal with our weakness and sin. One thing I have found myself struggling with is how to apply this verse, especially with individuals that don’t want to be sharpened.

There seems to be three types of potential sharpening experiences. The obvious and simplest one is when two or more come together for the purpose of being sharpened. They agree to let the others speak into their life and call them on things that need to change. The second potential sharpening experiences can be between those that have not “officially” said “Sharpen me” but are friends and in a relationship of trust and therefore can make observations that can sharpen each other. The 3^rd is when someone makes an observation or sees areas of sin in someone else’s life and the sin is affecting themselves or others around them negatively.

The first one is a pretty simple one because the doors are open for sharpening to occur and permission has been given. The other two are more complicated with the third being the most complicated. The question I am battling with right now is how to handle the 2^nd and 3^rd scenario. What is the responsibility of fellow believers to speak into each others life, especially when the sin or issue affects others and themselves negatively? Is it right to let someone continue to hurt themselves or others just because they have not given you permission to speak into their life?

I welcome thoughts and feedback because this is an issue I am struggling with and want to honor God first and then as best as I can my fellow brothers and sisters.

The Power of the Elements

For those that don’t know I work at a church as the Director of Media and Technical Ministries and one of my main responsibilities is for the creative elements of the Sunday Morning worship service. Well I was having a talk with a friend about some of the things we do in our service. We have a very contemporary service with some very good worship bands, dramas, videos and special music. Some of my favorite work is when I get to be creative in the worship part of our service. I meet with the worship pastor every week and discuss what the band will be doing that week. I then get to take that info and create elements with the worship. My main tools are lighting, video and sound.

I asked someone recently what they thought of the creative elements in worship. He told me for him additional elements on top of the musical worship can become distracting for him. He said what we do at church is not usually distracting but many times at other places he has been to it has. And this got me thinking about why I value these elements so much. And although it is not greatly profound I thought of the beauty and power of a thunderstorm. The clouds, the wind, the rain, the lightening, and the thunder are all powerful images of what all entails a great thunderstorm. All of us have been in one and most that I talk to have a love of them, at least the experience that comes with them. I think of sitting on my front porch and seeing the trees blowing in the wind and hearing the swooshing of the powerful gusts. Seeing the lighting and then almost immediately hearing the rattling roar of the thunder as it shook my house. And the sound and smell of the rain as it hit the roof and the ground around me. When I put all these elements together I know I have experienced a powerful thunderstorm. The same is for me with worship. It is the combination of all the elements that make a worship service powerful to me. I like it when it rains, but just because there is rain does not make it a powerful thunderstorm. For me the power comes when we bring it all together, as God does in the thunderstorms he creates. I want to follow the example from my creator. I want to be a part of using all the tools God has laid before to combine them together as a beautiful canvas of worship to him and in turn also provide a powerful tool for him communicate with me.

Community Today - Part 2

Well I have been thinking and experiencing this small group/community thing more the past couple of weeks and I have found it to be a great biblical blessing. First it is so refreshing to know I will be able to spend regular time with other believer and share fun, laughs, and life together. In the business of life it can feel so superficial spending sperratic time with so many different people.

However I know some feel that Christians can create a little “holy huddle” when they just spend time together, maybe that is true, but I am finding it is only through this community that we can really live Christ in the world. Jesus even said in John 13:34-35,
"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."

First, for me, I really believe I must love my fellow believers first to be who Christ wants me to be in the world. Then through this community my desire would be to see the community being Christ in the world.

Also I have been looking at Acts and the early church. They were dealing with the issue of taking care of the poor and the widows. It appears that the disciples were focusing on taking care of the poor and widows that were believers. This was the first priority and then they would enter the rest of the community around them. In this small group I have already experience the taking care of each other and other believers through this small group community. Things I would have not have been able to do or been even informed of the need, have now becomes places were I can server other believers and take care of each other. I don’t have extra plot of land to sell but I have some time and skills and I desire to share those with my follow believers and even more I desire to learn what it means in Acts 2:43-44
All the believers were together and had everything in common.

Community Today (Part 1)

Soon I will be starting a small group with some friends. I have been thinking about this concept of “small group” for some time now and I wrote a letter to those who we asked to be a part of a group. Here are some parts from the letter sharing my thoughts on small group community in 2007… more to come though…

We want to quickly tell you what we believe God is calling us to. As best we can in our modern world, we desire to live in an “Acts 2” community way. In the business of our everyday lives it can be very difficult to have true, deep community with other believers but we would like to see that happen. We desire to join in community with other couples and focus our time, energy, and support for those that we share that community with. As many of you have probably experienced, it can be hard to truly connect with others when you are trying to fit everyone into an already full life and family schedule. It can easily make you feel stretched thin relationally without feeling like there is a true relational community. So in an attempt to counter this, we desire to join with you to experience this community through a small group…

Honestly we don’t have any particular agenda, we just want to begin to live in community with other believes, believers that are our friends. We can meet at each others homes, go out, eat dinner, play games, share and pray, laugh and cry. It is about being together….

However, the goal is that through this small group we will be experiencing this community more then just every other week and in these times we will be experiencing it together with our entire families…

Now the invitation is out to you. Would you like to be involved in this community with us? This is not a group for us to lead. It is a group for us all to be in community together….

“Who is my neighbor”

I recently did a small paper for one of my communications class. I was supposed to find an article of some kind that I could break down the different types of communications in relationships. I chose the story out of Luke 10 commonly known as the story of the “Good Samaritan”. Since I was evaluating it for a class it did not have a lot of spiritual tones but it did bring back to mind something. The value of being a neighbor to a stranger. The story was stimulated by the statement from Jesus to love your neighbor as yourself and then the return questions to him “Who is my neighbor”. Check the story out in Luke 10 but to just say a few thoughts:

First Jesus asks at the end of the story who was the beaten man’s neighbor. The answer was the one who showed mercy and Jesus says, “Go and to likewise”. So the overall point is saying go and take care of your fellow man, regardless of who they are and maybe even regardless of the cost to you. Second Jesus is breaking the definition of neighbor from those that we know to anybody we encounter. This seems to raise the bar of “Love your neighbor as yourself”. Jesus seems to be saying love everyone you encounter as yourself, willing to give whatever it takes to take care of them the way you would take care of yourself… Just a quick thought.

Hypocrite? That's Not How I See It

As many of have heard what is now old news. A great Christian leader, Ted Haggard as step down from pastoring New Life Church in Colorado and as leader of the Association of Evangelicals because of drug and homosexual struggles and failures in his life. I know many that struggle with hearing this. The first thought that comes to many minds is the word hypocrite. However I can not call him that. Lets look at the definition of hypocrite: somebody who gives a false appearance of having admirable principles, beliefs, or feelings.

This is what I know about Ted Haggard. He did not give a false appearance of having certain principles, beliefs or feelings. What Ted Haggard did was immoral on all levels and he knows it and believes it. Even when he was struggling and falling in these areas he still believed what he was doing was wrong. He would be a hypocrite if he believed what he did was right and then preached that it was wrong or vise versa, but that is not the case. That is not the case with many Christians.

I have admired and respected Ted ever since I read his book “The Life Giving Church”. The thing is, I still value him as a person, author, and Christian. He fell and he in turn will suffer the consequences of his sin and he should be held accountable for them and seek help. However I hope and pray to see him restored one day. I have no anger toward him. I am disappointed, let down, and hurting to see a man I admired so much fall so hard. But I know that Jesus died for his sin just as much as mine. I can not hold his sin against him anymore then I would want Jesus to hold my sin against me.

I will still read his books and follow to see what God does next in his life because even though he did sin it is evident to me God was still speaking to him and using him through those times. God uses sinners; otherwise he could not use any of us. God even uses Christians that fall. Falling declares our need even more for Jesus. I am not ever excusing sin. I am saying that sin can be used by God to make an average Christian into a great Christian if we are willing to let God do His thing with our sin.

Voting Christianity/Voting Morals

I have to say that I am a fan of Government enforced moral direction. We see it all the time. Laws against murder hate crimes, rape, incest, etc. Once we think so foolishly as to say that the Government can’t enforce morality we will begin a failure as a state/country that will begin to affect all areas of life.

Taking God out of school is a great example. Some could use the arguments for taking prayer out of school was ok because the government should not legislate religion or morals. But the consequences of those Christians who did not act is, in part, the moral corruption of or teens (pregnancy, shooting, violence, dropouts) all severally increased following the removal of God from School. This is just one example.

I believe God in my life means I must vote and lobby God in my government as well. What Jesus did was say Your Christian life must be in your ENTIRE life. The Government I serve and obey is a major part of My Life. That is why I do believe moral legislation is a moral responsibility for Christians.

Husbands Love Your Wives

Eph 5:25-33

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her…

28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church- 30 for we are members of his body. 31 "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." 32 This is a profound mystery-but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

So isn’t this an interesting verse. A verse God has really been using to challenge me lately. I have been married for a little over 3 years now. And in these 3 years I have been learning so much about myself, my wife, and love. I think the concept about love form Corinthians might be a little easier to at least get then what this verse in Ephesians is doing. When Corinthians says love is Patient, kind etc. It makes since, love is this, but what about loving my wife like Christ loves the church? What did Christ do? He gave himself up for her. “Gave Himself up”. What a challenging phrase. You know I look at this verse and it continually challenges the husband to love the wife. And to love is to live toward her as Christ is toward me. Part of me says “dang” that is more then I want to do yet I can not move away from the challenge. The past few months I have been trying to live this and what I have learned is that I don’t really live it. It is very hard (at least for me) to continually love someone more then myself. That means doing what will bless her and doing what is not really what I want. Now the balance is to lead my home and my wife while also serving her and giving myself up for her. And once the leading part comes in this is even harder.

The challenge to myself has been every time I go to do something, go to say something, or even start thinking something I think how will this affect my wife. It might mean making sure I connect with her if I am not sure and making sure that my actions communicate love and that my heart REALLY is putting her above myself…

Good words to say but now that I am starting to live them I am finding how much more there is to do to be like Christ. I will love my wife and make her feel loved and I will make mistakes but at least for me it didn’t even start until I was real with myself about what God called me to has a husband and I chose to start living that way. I had to choose to start loving her and to give myself up for her.

The Heavy Heart

Prov 25:20
20 Like one who takes away a garment on a cold day,or like vinegar poured on soda, is one who sings songs to a heavy heart. NIV

I could easily be described as an optimistic person and intern could easily say that it is the best way to live. I have always thought that is the way to live but recently I have been seeing that maybe the optimistic side is not always the right way to go. I have been challenged by my wife (who is great at making me see what I could not see in my own) that trying to always be happy or find the positive might steal from a part of who God made us to be, human. What I mean is that our grieving, our hurt, our emotional pain are a part of who we are, and it molds us and makes us appreciate the good. But those things are so cliché. I am starting to see that there is so much more. The bible says that the “truth will set us free” and sometimes the truth and/or life just hurts. Even if the truth is right and in the long run good it can still hurt. I have found that when I try to find the good and ignore the negative or hurt this causes me to miss the truth and miss out living a life that encounters God in everything and allows our spirits to go through things God made us to.

The other thing I have been learning comes for directly from the verse mentioned above. I have realized that by trying to be optimistic when others are hurting (Singing a song to a heavy heart) I am making things worse and taking from them something they need to experience (takes away a garment on a cold day). This causes me to ask myself even deeper questions I can’t get into here: “Why do I have to “sing the songs to the heavy heart”? Why am I so uncomfortable with the pain of life? I am now trying to explore that area in my life but for now I look back and have to say that I was wrong so many times in my life when I was singing the songs instead of letting the heart be heavy. Although we can not live in sadness I am learning I must experience it. But in the end another Proverb rings out…

Prov 15:15
15 All the days of the oppressed are wretched, but the cheerful heart has a continual feast.

Along with this word from God…

Jer 31:13-14
I will turn their mourning into gladness; I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow.

In the end I want to let my God turn my morning (heavy heart) into gladness (singing the song), but still need to experience the heavy heart for a time as Ecclesiastes says…

Eccl 3:1-4
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: …
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance

The point is to let the heavey heart runs its God given course but then surrender that heavy heart to Father God and let him bring chear and experience that continual feast and in the long run, I love dancing!

Servant of All?

Mark 9:35

35 Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, "If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all."

NIV

Although I have been serving in my church since I was a young kid if I was honest with myself I would questions rather I have a clue of what it means to be the servant of all. I love serving God and doing things for him but that is one of the reasons it seems so easy. I love it. What if I didn’t? When I step out of my body and watch myself I wonder if I have any clue on what it is to be last and be the servant of all. If I enjoy it so much then am I really being a servant? But if I walk away from what I am doing am I still serving God the way he wants me to?

I want to know what it means to be last, not so I can be first, but so I can find out what it means to be a servant of all.

“Strange Sight” – Confirmation After

Ex 3:10-12

10 So now, go. I am sending you to Pharaoh to bring my people the Israelites out of Egypt."

11 But Moses said to God, "Who am I, that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?"

12 And God said, "I will be with you. And this will be the sign to you that it is I who have sent you: When you have brought the people out of Egypt, you will worship God on this mountain."

NIV

So first God gets our attention and then we have are human moments of fear. Then we are confronted with the choice, do we go or not? Do we do whatever we think God is telling us to do? Again I do understand how scary this is, I have fear myself but I have seen that fear diminish a lot over the years and at the end of this I will tell you why, but back to Moses. So God says “Go Now” but Moses still was a little unsure (as we all are). And then God did something that surprised me, he gave Moses a sign so that Moses would know that it was God (yeah, we all want that) but Moses would not see that sign until AFTER he had obeyed. (Wait a minute!) The thing is even though God does know are frailty and fear he still wants us to act by faith, not by sight. Now we can see times in the Bible were God gave signs before to those he was calling to something but following all of those there was still the moment when they had to act on faith. To be a Christ follower we must be willing to hear God’s voice and obey by faith, even when we are not sure. Jesus said in John 10:27 “My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.” Being a follower of Jesus is listening to the voice of God, letting him speak and acting, by faith, to see God do great things in us and through us. But we have a choice. Moses could have said “If you don’t give me the sign now then I won’t go”. God would have still done what He wanted but Moses might not have been the man.

I said I would tell you why I saw my fear diminish. Well it was because when I heard God, or thought I heard God. I started to step out and act on what I thought God was telling me. In that process I learned to know not only that God DOES speak but what his voice sounds like. It was a process and God used that “strange sight” many times to get my attention. But I learned to listen, and then learned to obey. If we choose to think God does not speak and we can just do whatever as long has it is not sin then I believe we will miss out on the great things God has for us. When God chooses me I want to GO, I don’t want my fear of the unknown or fear of even listening to Him speaking to stop me from being who God created me to be in everything He calls me to.